Mr. Hookah "god" Screws Me Out Of 1.5 Bowls...

[Raziel510]

Here's the Cliffnotes version. The full story is below.

- smoking with buddies when a know it all shows up and ends the session early
- sets up the hookah himself and everybody hates it and hates him for it.
- I come to the rescue and pack the best damn bowl I've ever packed
- know it all leaves the scene in shame...


First off, I'm not claiming to be an expert by any means, but I'd like to think that now I have a good grasp of the basics on how to set up a hookah and I can get it to smoke pretty good.

Well last weekend, I was smoking with some friends over at a friends place and some random people show up and decide to partake in the hookah. Fine by me, the more the merrier. It's too bad that one guy thought of himself as a hookah god/know it all. He started telling me that I set up the hookah all wrong and he yanks the hose from me, takes the hookah, empties the bowl (it was only half way done), and basically sets up the whole thing from scratch. All the while he's telling me that he'll show me how to set it up right because amongst his friends he's known as "the hookah god". So at this point I'm pretty pissed that he just ended the session like that (especially since I packed starbuzz in the bowl and that stuff dont come cheap!), but I decide to let it go and just let him set it up. Homeboy sets up the hookah and no one can get a decent smoke from it. The smoke gets way too harsh and he basically ruins the bowl (so now that's 1.5 bowls of starbuzz he's screwed me out of). I check to see what he did and I saw what went wrong. Instead of poking holes in the foil, mr hookah god here took out his knife and made 4-5 huge slashes in the foil. Also, the reason no one could get a good hit was because he packed the bowl really tight on the bottom so there was no airflow and the shisha was charring because it was basically fully exposed to the coals. Everyone starts raggin on the guy saying how he screwed everyone out a good session. Feeling embarrassed, homeboy decides to start blaming it on the hookah saying it wasn't sealed properly and it isn't made well and blah blah blah.

Now here's the good part:

So after everyone is done bashing on the guy for screwing everything up, I decide to pack one final bowl. I empty out the water (which is tinted red because of all the shisha and juice that made it's way down the hookah and into the base. Yuck!), pack a new bowl and light up some exoticas. The gods must have really been smiling on me that night, or maybe they really just wanted to see mr know it all burn because that must have been the best session I've had yet. The smoke was truly the thickest I've ever seen it and it was packed with flavor. People were literally oo'ing and aah'ing at the hits I was taking and they told the other guy that he had nothing on me. As for mr know it all...he suddenly got a call from his friend about a party (ya right...) and he ducked out of there as quick as he could. Even though it took 2.5 bowls to do it, it was the best time I've ever had smoking hookah. Cheers! Edited February 11, 2008 by Raziel510

[racemyghost]

Awesome.

If someone ended my session like that (especially if i dont even know the bastard) he would get his ass kicked. If i didnt do it, one of my friends would. lol

We're serious about our shit. hahaha

Happy

[Texico]

Damn straight and another reason I don't smoke Starbuzz. Lucky for me I tend to not keep the extra ma'assel out in the open, so when something like this happens I can just say that it's the last that I brought with me. That's great that you got the good bowl out of it, though!

I like the Cliffnotes, too, but they should be at the top...

[jayson]

I'd tell him to get the fuck out once he started messing with my hookah. It's like a stereo in the car, the passenger doesn't change the settings... it's just not a kosher thing to do.

[austinthecity]

I'd tell him to get the fuck out once he started messing with my hookah. It's like a stereo in the car, the passenger doesn't change the settings... it's just not a kosher thing to do.

unless the passenger has boobs...

/sexism

[camelflage]

unless the passenger has boobs...

truth.

as for the topic, noone who i do not approve of touches my hookah while it is in use. thats a good way to get fingers broken.

[Raziel510]

There we go. Edited so that the cliffnotes version is on top.

[MechAnt]

Oh man, that better not be Narain, Mina, or someone. Either way, that really sucks, I hate it when people think they know what they're doing but ends up they are dipshits. Like my friend that refuses to believe that 1g each of carbohydrates and protein have the same amount of calories as each other. He gave me some bullshit about how glycolysis proves that carbs have more calories than protein. Like mentioned, if anyone tries to touch my pipe claiming a better session than what *I* can pack, they will get their fingers broken. I allowed it once and the mofo starts rinsing a handful of shisha under the running sink. WTF!

[Raziel510]

^ haha seems like you know more than one person that does that. I think his name was Jules or something like that. He told me his names but I completely forgot. But ya, I was pretty pissed when you just yanked the hookah away and I was gonna say more than a few choice words to him but he had already emptied the bowl by then so I figured I'd spare myself and everyone else the drama and see how this played out.

By the way MechAnt, are you allowed to smoke in the dorms or do you just keep quiet about that?

[erufiku]

MechAnt: well, it does take the body more energy (ie., calories that you get from another source) to process a gram of protein, so theoretically he is right. Of course it's 4kcal in both cases but carbs get turned into glucose a lot faster, esp. compound ones (sugars?). I'm not sure about the terminilogy cause I never studied this stuff in English.

And getting back on topic... Some people just need a hearty portion of ass-whooping

[Canon]

someoen tries that stuff on me and they are dead. i woudl have been soo pissed if someoen took one of my bowls (esp if i ahve tangiers in it) and makes it go to waste..

now saying that i had a killer bowl last night, ive never packed tangiers so well in my life and me and my friends raped the bowl. it lasted a good 4 hours. everyone was talking about how well the hookah was and how i knew my stuff (other people tried to do the hookah before me but failed)

[jayson]

unless the passenger has boobs...

/sexism

It's called fortitude, my friend! I will not be swayed by their feminine badonkadonk nor melons. My stereo is my stereo regardless of sex.

[MechAnt]

By the way MechAnt, are you allowed to smoke in the dorms or do you just keep quiet about that?

I was actually caught smoking in the dorms around October. I got three violations. Covering fire alarm (most severe), smoking in room, and intentionally breaking res hall rules. I got probation . If you keep quiet about it, you'll never have a problem. Towel the door, use a beanie that can easily be yanked off, and open a window. Some idiot propped a main door open that allowed the burning smell from the wildfires into the building so the ARD and a bitchy RA started knocking on all the doors and caught me

Narain and Mina are good guys. That's why I'd expect much better of them. Some other people are just tools.

[Geiseric]

I thankfully have the reverence amongst my peers as to never have this happen with the usual crowd (if anything, I'm too damn picky about my smoke, I will pull a burning bowl long before anyone else has even noticed the flavor change), but I did have someone try to one-up me while setting up a bowl a few months back, and I just laid down the law(it's my hookah, my tobacco, and my coal, so smoke up or get out). I also would never even let anyone touch my main hookah, but that is mostly because I blew 200 on it.

Seems like poetic justice for the dick who ruined your smoke, though.

*Edit*
Ouch, MechAnt, that sucks. I got busted, too, by the landlords via complaints of my asshole roommates. Are you still smoking in the dorm, and just being careful, or what? At least you live where it is warm enough to smoke outside all year... what I wouldn't give for that... Hell we can't even smoke on campus where I'm at. Edited February 11, 2008 by Geiseric

[MechAnt]

I'm not smoking in the dorms anymore. It's not really like me to get in trouble so much cause I tend to keep a clean nose. I keep it at my friend's place and go there once or twice a week for a nice session. Our dorms, we're not even allowed to keep hookahs. The rule book specifically says no hookahs. Dammit!

[Geiseric]

You moving off campus next semester, or sticking it out? I only lasted 2 semesters on campus, couldn't stand the RA bullshit and the ridiculous *rent*.

[MechAnt]

I'm moving out once spring quarter (yes, we are on quarters ) ends. Summer in the neighboring town and the rest of my college career. My RA is the coolest guy ever but its some of the others that turn me off from dorms.

[Canon]

when im smoking with others and if i know that someone can pack a bowl, ill let them pack it. except my girl, i always pack her bowls.

about a week ago i had a friend over and i told him to pick any flavor, he picked chocolate mint, then i had him pack the bowl.. he used the tongs to pack it, i told him he could use his hands and just wash them but he didnt wanna get anything on his fingers... so he sets up everything, the foils loose as hell, and he packed it way way too tight. so i had to fix it (via sticking something through the center of the foil and losening up the shisha) it made it looser, but i didnt smoke it much because i dont like chocolate mint all that much.

[Ralleac]

I generally pack every bowl I actually plan on smoking if we're using my hookah because I'm generally the one supplying the shisha and I don't want it to be a wasted session. A few of my friends know how to do it well enough that I make them handle it when I'm feeling lazy, though. Edited February 11, 2008 by Ralleac

[BillySoCo7]

Hey mech. I go to school at Mount Saint Mary College in New York. I'm the RA in my building. I've detached the smoke detector in my room and have 6 hookahs in my room. My residents come to me to place orders online through HS because i'm an affiliate. I smoke about 3-6 times a day in my room and i'm always having people stop by to play some PS3 and have a good shisha session. You should come to school here and live in my building.

[iamscott06]

Hey mech. I go to school at Mount Saint Mary College in New York. I'm the RA in my building. I've detached the smoke detector in my room and have 6 hookahs in my room. My residents come to me to place orders online through HS because i'm an affiliate. I smoke about 3-6 times a day in my room and i'm always having people stop by to play some PS3 and have a good shisha session. You should come to school here and live in my building.

OKay that sounds awesome! Your probably the best RA ever.. And when you say your an affialte for HS you mean..???

[BillySoCo7]

They have this program where you can become and affiliate. You give them an application or some shit and they will give you a web link with your affiliate ID number. Then when people order from that link to their site you get 10% of their order. So if my friends ask me where to place an order I can give them that link and then I'll get 10% of their total bill.

[Geiseric]

.... but you can get that through the forum discount... Is it stackable?

[Seanij]

you shoulda put out a coal on his face =P

[MechAnt]

Hey mech. I go to school at Mount Saint Mary College in New York. I'm the RA in my building. I've detached the smoke detector in my room and have 6 hookahs in my room. My residents come to me to place orders online through HS because i'm an affiliate. I smoke about 3-6 times a day in my room and i'm always having people stop by to play some PS3 and have a good shisha session. You should come to school here and live in my building.

Man, you are by far the chillest RA of all time. I like UCSB cause it has great academic reputation, fantastic location, good looking people (the only UC where a headshot is required ), and its a great balance between work and play. The offer is oh so tempting tho....