Depression Ftl

[Giant Ninja Robot]

I've struggled with depression for as long as I can remember. I'm thinking of going back on meds,as I just don't feel I'm stable enough for my kids, but have started taking St. John's Wart as of a few days ago in a trial capacity. Anyone have info about it? I have heard it used to be perscribed in the early 90s but was taking sales away from other antidepression meds, true or false? Has it worked for anyone?

Anyone elso sick and tired of feeling negative and frankly, like shit, on and off, ad infinitum?

This can be here on out known as the "Eeyore thread"

Thank you, Mark

[Canon]

why not try some volunteer work? ive heard that helps

[Giant Ninja Robot]

It's not something completely fixed with actions, even when I was at the peak of my game, healthy as an ox, and volunteering literally 5-7 days a week it was lurking in the background if not actively affecting me. I was diagnosed but I don't remember if it was chemical or not. I'm starting to think it might be, hence wanting to go back to meds, I just can't stand what Paxil, Risperdol, and Depakote did to me, zombified 3-4 years of my life.

I'm currently getting into better shape through excercise, letting my creative juices out through music, starting back into volunteering, and doing what I can to take what I can't change and accept it for what it is while changing what I can, but through experience I know it's not enough.

Thanks for the suggestion though. Edited September 9, 2008 by giant ninja robot

[pullingteeth]

i've been diagnosed with PTSD (Post traumatic stress disorder). and i attempted suicide and ended up in a psych ward. i learned more about myself in those 4 days than ever before. i just wish some lessons could be learned without such drastic measures.

the way that i look at it now. there is always somebody else in the world that has it worse off than i do. sometimes i might think my life is complete shit but at least i have food and a roof above my head.

if you're fond of reading i'd suggest Man's Search For Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl

it was different to me seeing as how i'm atheist. but it really struck a nerve. he was a psychiatrist that was in Auschwitz during WWII and how living through that he pioneered the belief of logotherapy. which has alot to do with life having meaning and that without tragedy or despair ultimately life would have no meaning.

i'm sorry if this was just a long senseless rant that was uninterpretable... let me know and i can try to elaborate further.

[Giant Ninja Robot]

No not at all senseless.

I was in a ward once at 13 for 2 weeks and a longterm open campus children's institution for 6 months at 14 so I'm familiar with the insight one can gain out of life's normal circumstance within the context of something drastic or extreme.

I was just talking to a friend about the perspective one gains when going through hard times and am most definately going to pick up that book, thank you for the suggestion. I'm a voracious reader who is German and Jewish and Theistic (but confused lol) so it should be a book fit for me.

Yeah man, I've been third world volunteering and inner city many times as well so I'm definately blessed and that train of thought does help me when the depression is more a product of my own self pity.

Thank you for the meaningful post and being willing to share personal stories with some dude you don't know. Edited September 9, 2008 by giant ninja robot

[pullingteeth]

anytime man.

i'd basically given up on helping myself...so i focus more or less on helping my friends (or people i don't know) through their problems. because the majority of my friends all come to me for advice.

maybe i should aspire to become a therapist some day. (the therapist i had during my time in that psych ward was actually the person that recommended that book to me)

[Giant Ninja Robot]

It's ironic that the most fucked up of us often have the most level advice and are the ones that are leaned upon, no? Do we have stickers that say "Hey, I've been through some shit ask me!" on our backs?

I'm usually the advice giver and problem solver too but thought I could really use some advice/support/thoughts on this one.

[jezter6]

I've been work/stress related depressed for ~2 years now. I'm hesitant to go to people to fix it, I tried to get another job and hope that just getting out of the situaiton would change it and it hasn't.

It sucks to wake up every morning and debate calling in sick just so you don't have to deal with life.

[cotsi95]

Totally agree jez my girlfriend just moved like an hour and a half away from me and not seeing her everyday is really getting to me, and to make it worse my mom who i usually talk to about all this stuff is in alaska on a cruise for another week and then comes back for 2 more and then to paris for 3 weeks! UGH


BTW eeyore is awesome!

[mushrat]

I've struggled with stress/depression/etc for most of my adult life. Get help from a professional.

If they offer medication, find out what the lowest dose you can effectivly take is. They always prescibe me one thing and i try half that and often find it works fine. I tell the dr.'s and they go..oh great, well if it work, go for it.

I've already had to bury a friend who suffered from depression a month ago..lets keep it to one a year shall we? ;-)

[Giant Ninja Robot]

Hey Mush no burial here, Got way to much to live for, just slightly despondant.

Thanks for the commisery guys, I know this is no fun to discuss but hey, when shit's real it's real, whatever that means.

Yeah I do the same thing Jez, I look for outside circumstantial changes to heal my inner screwed-up-edness. Never seems to work, hmmmm.

Mush, I don't feel that professional help has ever worked well, it tends to help me in one aspect then fuck me up even more in another. I had a shrink from age 11 to age 15 and he essentially just agreed with whatever my Dad said and wanted to hear since I wasn't paying for sessions. The advice didn't work at all, actually made things worse for the most part. Maybe as an adult it would be better? Something to consider.

[jezter6]

Mine's --- odd.

I was married and divorced very young. I've been taken hard by child support that is the state maximum amount for my pay, when others I know pay like $200 a month total for 3 kids. I had a really crappy job that I hated and hated most of the people I worked for. I have bad credit due to screwups and the young divorce. I can barely make ends meet some times and I have to live with my roommate in the house he bought because I can't afford to get my own apartment, let alone actually buy a house.

I've got - circumstantial depression. I'm depressed because of all the shit I have to go through.

I need a hobby. Otherwise all I do is complain that I don't do anything but sit in front of the tv. I do go to the gym 2-3 times a week, but it's not 'enough' to take my time up and I'm still depressed about how I haven't lost enough weight at the gym.

Life sucks.

[Doubon]

I can not speak from experience and have not suffered any clinical form of depression but am I the only one who feels that our country's method for dealing with psychological disorders is medicate, medicate, medicate?

I can't offer a solution Mark, but I'm really bummed to hear this. I hope you're alright.

[mushrat]

Hey Mush no burial here, Got way to much to live for, just slightly despondant.

Thanks for the commisery guys, I know this is no fun to discuss but hey, when shit's real it's real, whatever that means.

Yeah I do the same thing Jez, I look for outside circumstantial changes to heal my inner screwed-up-edness. Never seems to work, hmmmm.

Mush, I don't feel that professional help has ever worked well, it tends to help me in one aspect then fuck me up even more in another. I had a shrink from age 11 to age 15 and he essentially just agreed with whatever my Dad said and wanted to hear since I wasn't paying for sessions. The advice didn't work at all, actually made things worse for the most part. Maybe as an adult it would be better? Something to consider.

as an adult you can tell them what you want and dont have to put up with BS you don't.

[Bulldog_916]

GNR:

I first off wanna tell you that I support you and I hope you pull through this whole imbalance.

I experienced something similar, I got cured from it through hard labor. During the time I was 18 and 19 I worked as a dock loader for FedEx. It was a lonely existence in the trailers but it got me thinking about who I was and who I wanted to become. Sweating for hours on end and then going to school helped me grow up. I never had time to think about how shitty life was because I was always doing something. If you find yourself getting depressed, pack a lunch with the wife or girlfriend and go out to a secluded spot and just walk. Appreciate what you see around you. Getting out in nature and getting away from the city makes you wonder how we got this far. If you can do some fishing while you're out, that's even better. I'm a huge believer in outdoor therapy.

[gaia.plateau]

Drink?

[Dip_King]

Drink?

If your suggesting drinking, thats not even fucking funny. Alchohol fucks up peoples lives even worse, trust me I know

[Johnny_D]

Drink?

If your suggesting drinking, thats not even fucking funny. Alchohol fucks up peoples lives even worse, trust me I know

well this is hookah forum, not manic depressive's forum.

What the fuck do any of us know about it? Maybe I shoudl start a post about the random odd pains in my left testicle?

Gaia's answer, whilst comedic in style, is not far from teh truth. I have drunk myself through many hard times without it 'fucking' up my life.

If you have not got the self-control to deal with alcohol then avoid it. Just like any potential habit forming substance. (Cigarettes, alcohol, hookah even).

JD

[Stuie]

Well I suffered from PTSD (car wreck that almost killed me and my wife) and major depression since college.

Here is what I did and still do, when it comes up.

I talk to my doc, sometimes a few visits to a therapist to meds.

Talk to my wife and best friend about what's going on

Pick up my bass guitar and play till my fingers blister

Smoke a little hookah and start working on a personal project to get something done and feel accomplished

Just my 2 cents.

[TheScotsman]

Drink?

Worked for me.

Get hooked on all that psycho-altering medication and you are a goner for sure. Try dealing with a VA witch doctor!

[Apets22]

Sounds like a personal problem to me.

Justttttttttt kidding, Im trying to make light of a serious situtation.

Anywho, I was never clinically but I feel like Ive hit rock bottom a few times. Last year I got wasted, told all of my friends to go fuck themselves, tried to fight another. Im ususally happy go lucky when I drink. Before that I got in a huge fight with my parents, none of my close friends from high school went to the same college as me. My college friends who I told to go fuck themselves and I had been slowly falling out before that, I was being excluded or not invited when all of them hung out. I felt like I had no support from anyone. Oh, and my grandmother died a month or so prior as well. It was an awful feeling and as this all happened near the end of the second semester I took all of this into summer.

When summer came my best friend since pre-school was destroying himslef with alcohol and had never gotten over the death of his father in the 7th grade and ever since then was a different person. I blamed my self for my buddies alcoholism as it was me who forced him to drink the first time. Then the girl who I was dating completly stopped talking to me, didnt break up with me just stopped talking to me. My best friend from high school decided to stay in Chicago (Where he went to school). My other 3 really close friends from high school all were busy with girlfriends. When my birthday came in June I had no one. That really hurt. Then I got fired from both of my jobs

I then moved into my apartment on campus in late July and everything had turned around my college friends were no longer mad at me, which was great even though I still feel a bit removed from them.

Anyways the point of this novel is that things will get better, they always seem to rebound in one way or another. Focus on the positive and make yourself happy first and foremost. I personally got a tattoo and said fuck what everyone else thinks, which helped alot. Just remember that there is someone there for you. For me it was one of my old work buddies who came back JUST to see me, we played golf partied and had a great time.

Like I said it wasnt clinical or anything, just a bad time in my life, Im sure its different if its clinical like you said, but that just helped me

Good luck and well wishes from a fellow east side michigander.

[Giant Ninja Robot]

Yeah I stay away from heavy drinking and only drink in excess a few times a year. Alcohol addiction runs in my family so I try to stay away from that as a calming method or solution to a bad day.

Stuie you pretty much hit it on the head and Bulldog you as well, thanks for the perspective guys. Some days just get really bad and it helps to talk about it, even to my online hookah buddies.

That day I ended up going outside and playing with my daughters and the crisp early fall weather did the trick for the most part. Yesterday I worked some more on a hip hop beat I've put off for far too long and that helped a bunch too. I think it gets really bad when I'm being inactive and start to get down on myself for procrastnation and whatnot.

Thanks for all the comments, and um, this is labeled SERIOUS DISCUSSION so a little maturity does help though no hard feelings at all, I know we're a bunch of jokers (I know I AM).

I'm sure we can help eachother out in the "Eeyore thread" when those of us who do struggle with depression have a bad day/week/month.

Consider it open to anyone.

[gaia.plateau]

Let me give you some sincere advice.



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[Giant Ninja Robot]

I don't think it's possible to be depressed after that last pic combo, gaia

[ColibriDon]

Well, I guess I can be a pretty optimistic guy but like all people, I had to deal with a really bad time in High School--this was mainly due to my Mom having an even harder time but oh well. Anyway, what always helped me, and I know this sounds stupid, was talking to my German Shepard, Vader (That's right, Darth Vader! haha). This probably just has to do with talking about it in general. Although, at least with a dog, you know there's no chance of the conversation being focused on them! haha

But now that I'm in college and away from my dogs, whenever I have a tough time I always just talk to my friend who I've known since 7th grade. Talking always helps. Also, focusing on something else like a hobby really helped me. I picked up photography around then which really helped as well.

I'm sorry that anybody has to be depressed but finding a way to deal with it when it happens is necessary and I'm sure you will too.

-Colibri